


I Am A Warrior (See My Tiger Stripes)

by HenryTheHAP



Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: Alpha Jace Wayland, Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Alpha/Omega, Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Knotting, M/M, Omega Alec Lightwood, Post Mpreg, Rimming
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-01-02
Updated: 2019-01-02
Packaged: 2019-10-02 20:43:23
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 7,453
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17270807
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HenryTheHAP/pseuds/HenryTheHAP
Summary: After giving birth, Alec is uncomfortable with his body. Jace doesn't know, and doesn't understand why his Mate is pulling away.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [nashcreates](https://archiveofourown.org/users/nashcreates/gifts).



> This story is dedicated to Nashcreates, as your comment on one of my other stories inspired me to finish this after one and a half years. Hope you enjoy!

The sun was already up, sun shining in through an open bedroom window, and birds singing in the tress below. On the large bed dominating the room lay three people. One, a blond male Alpha, lay on the right, seemingly taking up most of the space as he in his sleep reached across the large expanse of mattress between himself and a brunet male Omega, who lay close to the edge on the left side with his back to his Mate and curled around a small bundle where a tuft of golden hair was just visible.

Jace woke up as his Mate rolled over onto his back. The Omega took a deep breath before pushing away the duvet, sitting up and swinging his legs over the side of the bed. Jace followed quickly, pressing against Alec's t-shirt covered back and placing his hands on Alec's upper arms as he planted kisses on his shoulders "Morning."

"Morning," Alec replied disinterestedly. He shrugged away from Jace's touch, getting up. "I need a shower."

"Want me to join?" Jace asked hopefully.

Alec gave him an unimpressed look. "Our baby needs watching."

"Yeah, shit, sorry," Jace replied contrite. He felt himself deflate at his Mate's rejecting attitude.

Giving a frustrated sigh, Alec didn't acknowledge his apology as he headed into the bathroom. Jace watched him leave, feeling miserable.

A sniffle came from the small bundle Alec had previously been wrapped around. Jace saw a tiny hand peek out, and he picked up the little baby and held him close. Getting out of bed gingerly, he went into the kitchen and made Max a bottle of milk before he could start to wail. 

Max was happily feeding when Alec joined them in the kitchen. The Omega looked drained as he sat down as far away from them at the table as he could. Jace tried not to take it personally, even though it was. Alec was pretty much inseparable from Max, excluding whenever Jace had him. The Omega seemed to detest Jace holding their baby. His face would twist into a barely suppressed expression of disgust, and he'd only throw looks of displeasure every now and then.

"Do you want to take over?" Jace asked. "And I'll make breakfast?"

Alec immediately held out his hands to receive his baby, and Jace carefully handed Max over. It was the closest he ever got to Alec anymore without the Omega flinching away from him. Accepting the bottle from Jace, Alec's face instantly softened as he stared down at his baby with love and devotion.

It hurt, and Jace forced down the wish to just leave the room, or even leave the house altogether. He got up, making breakfast as offered. Alec liked fruit first thing in the morning, apples being an important part since he couldn't have coffee, so Jace made sure to always have a fresh supply of the things Alec preferred. He cut them up into bite-sized portions so that Alec could eat one-handed if he wanted to. It was often the case, since he refused to put down their child long enough to even enjoy a quick meal, and would rather forgo it altogether if that was the alternative.

When Max finished eating, Jace offered to burp him so Alec could eat more easily, and he could have insulted Alec for all the difference in the Omega's expression. Not even dignifying his offer with a reply, Alec put a cloth onto his shoulder and manoeuvred Max up so he could complete the task. 

"Sleep well?" Jace asked in an attempt to start a conversation.

Alec glared at him, bags under his eyes answering that question. The Omega got up and left without word, leaving his food half-uneaten.

Sighing, Jace placed cling film over the bowl and stuck it in the fridge, knowing Alec would finish it later. He cleaned up, emptying the dishwasher, disinfecting Max's bottles, boiling water, and wiping down the table and countertops. After, he stayed in the kitchen for a while, bracing himself on the countertop with the cloth still in his hand as he bowed his head and breathed deeply, trying desperately not to cry. He felt worn thin, wrung out, because no matter what he did, Alec seemed to always be mad at him. He hadn't figured out if he'd done one big thing wrong without realising it, or was simply failing as a Mate. Falling short as Alec's Alpha had always been Jace's biggest fear. Before the brunet he'd never believed he could be loved. He'd come from an abusive home with an Alpha father that was a disgrace to his denomination, and Jace had been scared his bad childhood had left him unprepared to be a good Alpha for his own Omega. Now it seemed that fear had been legitimate.

Despite his every effort, he'd been unable to fix things. Alec had closed off completely, barely talking to him, and flinching away from his every touch as if the mere thought of being at all physical disgusted him. Every night the Omega went to bed with his back turned to Jace, as far away as the bed would allow while still being safe for Max. He hated the blond being anywhere near Max almost as much as he disliked Jace near himself.

Jace would do anything his love wanted, and at this point he wondered if that was him leaving. Alec made it clear every day that Jace's presence was unwanted, and not really needed. There seemed to be no faith in Jace's capabilities as a Mate, Alpha and provider.

A tear slipped unbidden down Jace's cheek. He hastily wiped it away, straightening up and taking a deep breath, pushing down the swirling emotions. He rinsed off the cloth and hung it over the tap. There were clothes to wash, and shopping to be done. He chuckled weakly as he looked at the list on the fridge. More nappies. His boy was a little poop monster. Taking the list, he stuffed it in his back pocket, before going into the living room and finding his Omega and son on the couch. Alec curled his lip and twisted away when Jace tried to drop a kiss on his head, and Jace swallowed down the sting, instead letting the brunet know he was going to the store and asking if Alec wanted something. His Mate ignored him, pointedly cooing to their baby and pretending like Jace wasn't standing right there. Feeling a clenching in his chest, Jace went into the wash room and sorting a load for the laundry. Having started it, he headed back into the living room and to their en suite for a quick shower, pretending not to see Alec curl a little tighter at his presence. Drying off and dressing, he found his wallet and once again asked his Mate if Alec wanted anything from the store, receiving a glare in reply. Feeling defeated, Jace grabbed his keys and put his shoes on, offering a goodbye that went unanswered.

 

*************************

That was how the days pretty much went. Alec would pretend to sleep, or ignore Jace, on the mornings when he got up for work, and spent their evenings curled up with Max, often hiding in the nursery with the door closed. The only times he unwillingly let Jace hold Max was whenever he took a shower or was afraid to spill food on him, and Jace was sure most of the reason Alec made sure to eat well was due to Max's need for milk.

Today was the one time a week Alec took a shower by himself. He usually bathed with Max, but every Saturday he started the morning off with a shower. With the door closed. Another new thing since Max's birth, and Jace had learned that Alec expected that door to stay closed. He'd opened it once earlier on to get his phone, and Alec had locked himself in the nursery with Max for the rest of the day after snarling at Jace about privacy and common decency.

The shower had been off for a while now, though, so Jace figured it was okay to pop his head in. Planning on letting Alec know Max was sleeping, he opened the door to their bathroom. He'd barely swung the door open when Alec snatched up a towel, covering his torso.

"What the _fuck_ do you think you're doing?" Alec snarled in a low voice. "Why isn't Max with you?"

"I-"

"Never mind," Alec snapped, cutting him off and storming past him. The Omega headed into the living room where Max's elevated play pen was. The baby was sniffling, having woken up the minute Jace had stepped away, and just before Alec could make it over, he gave the first signs of starting to cry. Alec, still covering himself with his towel, scooped him up, and curled up on the overstuffed bowl chair, almost like a nest with a higher area to lean against, that they'd put next to the pen so Alec could stay close to Max. He carefully rocked the baby and cooed as he held Max so the baby's head was resting against his shoulder. He glared at Jace before placing his full attention on Max, dismissing Jace.

 

******************

 

After weeks of this, Jace felt defeated. He sat down on his side of the bed, feet on the floor and elbows on his knees as he rested his head in his hands. He heard Alec open the door and pause. "Alec..."

"Don't do this now," Alec sighed.

"Do you even want me here anymore?" Jace asked. The silence that met his ears was deafening. "Okay." He got up. "I'll stay in the spare room," he mumbled, leaving.

Having expected Alec's response, however much he'd hoped it wouldn't be the case, Jace had already made the spare bed. As he lay under the crisp, clean sheets, facing away from the door, his heart clenched. Several months ago, when they'd been expecting, Jace had envisioned their little family finally being complete. He and his perfect Mate had been excited about the long hoped-for addition, discussing names and preparing for the new arrival. Everything had been perfect. Alec had been radiant, despite his grumbles about the changes to his body, and Jace had told his Omega over and over that he was truly stunning. He'd stare in awe at the swollen belly, watching and touching curiously whenever Max moved. Alec would look at him in amusement whenever Jace talked to his belly, sometimes jokingly complaining that Jace was paying their baby more attention than him. Jace made sure to prove him wrong about that every night, and whenever Alec wanted, which was often, and Jace had enjoyed how libidinous his Omega had been.

Then Max had been born. Their beautiful, healthy baby boy. Jace's dream of a happy family seemed to have come true.

Abruptly, though, everything had changed. Alec had been understandably exhausted and in pain the first week, and Jace could understand that everything must be overwhelming for the Omega. He no longer bore Max in his tummy, something that had been distressing for Alec, and it was even harder for him due to the restrictions placed upon him because of the operation. He couldn't pick up Max whenever he wanted, and could only hold him when sitting down because of the strain on his body and the fear his stitches would rip. He'd been pretty miserable, and Jace had tried to help him as much as possible, something the Omega in the beginning had appreciated. As he'd recovered, however, Alec had started acting strange, at first being a little distant and less affectionate. As the weeks passed, he began pulling away even more, until he reached a point where Jace could no longer pretend it was all his imagination, or explain it to himself as having to be an after-effect of the birth. Alec had been cold, then snappy, then angry, and now wasn't pulling away necessarily so much as he was pushing Jace away. He monopolised Max and avoided Jace whenever possible, even telling Jace on many occasions to leave him alone with _his_ , not _their_ , baby.

Now, after months, Jace accepted that things clearly weren't going to change for the better. For whatever reason, Alec no longer wanted him. He'd failed as a Mate and as an Alpha, but the shame of that didn't come close to the pain of knowing he had lost the one man he'd ever loved, and the baby he loved and adored more than anything. It hurt so much Jace didn't even cry. He stared at the wall facing away from the door, numb, as the last months swirled through his head, and he contemplated the logistics of how to proceed. He didn't know what to do, if he should move into the spare room, or move out. At this point he had to respect that Alec was done with him. The Omega had made that abundantly clear.

The snick of the door was heard as it opened. Jace stayed still, listening to his Mate slip into the room and wondering why Alec was there. He let his eyes flicker up to meet Alec's as the Omega came into view, and he didn't even bother trying to suppress his sadness.

Alec slid into bed next to him, placing a sleeping Max carefully between them. "Come back to our room," he requested gently.

"You don't want me there," Jace replied miserably. "Do you want me at all anymore?"

"I do," Alec promised. "I want you there, and I want you. Come back to bed."

"Yeah?" Jace said bitterly. "I've noticed. Especially since you haven't let me get near you in weeks."

"Please," Alec said softly. "Just come back to bed."

"What's going on?" Jace asked. "What happened? What did I do?"

Alec sighed. "It's not you."

"Don't even go there," Jace replied tiredly.

"I don't feel attractive anymore," Alec said. "My body..." He stopped, eyes getting glassy.

"You're always gorgeous to me," Jace insisted.

"Really?" Alec said bitterly, disbelief clear. He got out of bed, making sure not to disturb Max. Turning to Jace, he took his shirt off, not meeting Jace's eyes. His face was twisted in humiliation and disgust at himself, and his shame tore at Jace's heart.

Careful not to jostle Max, Jace sat up, taking in Alec's form. He reached out, taking Alec's hand and tugging him close, and Alec went hesitantly. The Omega flinched when Jace gently placed his hands on his stomach. The flat, toned torso Jace knew, muscles flexing, was far gone. In its place the fat caused by his pregnancy rounded his tummy, large purple-red stretch marks lining his stomach and making the skin uneven. The angry scar from his C-section peaked up over the elastic waistband of his pants. Jace leaned forward, cupping the swell tenderly and pressing a kiss to right over his navel. "You're stunning," he swore softly.

"Jace, don't." Alec tried to move away, but Jace stopped him, gripping his hips.

"Listen to me," Jace said firmly. "You're beautiful."

Alec shifted uncomfortably. "Please..." He took a step back, and Jace let him, instantly following.

"No, Alec. Trust me, you're so sexy, I could..." Jace grabbed Alec's hand, bringing it to his hardening dick. "If I could, I'd... Fuck... I'd fuck you until there's no doubt in your mind that you're gorgeous. I'd have you on every surface in this house." His voice was hoarse as he pressed against Alec, directing his Mate's hand to rub against his erection. "I want you so much."

Alec gave a low whine in the back of his throat. "Jace... Fuck, I need you."

"Wish I could fuck you, babe," Jace murmured. He sighed in frustration, taking Alec's hand off his dick. "I love you."

"I love you, too," Alec replied with a soft smile, wrapping his arms over Jace's shoulders. "Come to bed."

"Definitely," Jace grinned. He stepped back so Alec could pick up Max. Alec gave him an expectant look, and Jace blinked in surprise, then turned and picked up their son hesitantly, hoping he was doing the right thing. When he turned back around, Alec gave him a soft smile, moving so Jace's forearms were against Alec's chest.

"He's beautiful," the Omega said in a voice full of awe. "You look good like this, daddy."

Jace grinned brightly, happiness filling him. In the entire time Max had been in their lives, Alec had never acknowledged him as a dad. He caught Alec's lips in a chaste kiss. "You're amazing."

They headed back to their room, and for the first time other than earlier that night, Alec let Max lie between them. He curled up around Max, bringing his legs up so Jace could bend his own legs and press his thighs against Alec's shins. Jace wondered if he'd remembered he was still shirtless, and he let his eyes trail appreciatively over the displayed body he'd missed.

Alec caught him looking, and a pleased blush stained his cheeks. "I love you. I'm sorry."

"Don't be," Jace reassured him. "I should have made more of an effort to figure out what was bothering you. I love you, Alec. Don't ever doubt how beautiful I find you. You're the love of my life."

"I can't believe the way you decide to prove you still find me attractive is by pressing my hand against your dick and telling me you want to fuck me," Alec snickered.

"Well," Jace shrugged. "It worked, and it's true. And you weren't unaffected."

"Well, you're still as gorgeous and all hard muscle as you've always been," Alec replied with a grin.

"And your body might have changed, and you're as beautiful to me as you've ever been," Jace answered. "Got yourself some beautiful tiger stripes, there, daddy." Careful not to bump Max, Jace trailed a finger down one of the stretch marks.

"Tiger stripes?" Alec raised his eyebrows with an amused look.

"Mhm," Jace smirked, climbing over Max to push Alec onto his back and slip between his legs. "My beautiful tiger. My warrior. Don't ever think I'll find you anything less than the most beautiful person I've ever seen. No matter how you change, you're still you, and it's you I love, and this," he placed his hands on Alec's rounded stomach, "this is a symbol of our love. Of our union. Of the best gift you've ever given me other than that." He touched the scars of his Claiming Mark on Alec's neck.

"I've been so scared," Alec admitted. "I know it was irrational, but look at me. No matter if I lose all this _fat_ ," he poked harshly at his stomach. "No matter if I get my six-pack back, no matter what I do, I'll still have these stupid stretch marks and scar and wrinkled skin and-"

"Don't," Jace said sharply. He'd covered Alec's stomach with his hands when the Omega had jabbed it, as if protecting it from Alec's treatment. "Don't say anything about your body is stupid. You had a _baby_ , Alec. You created a _life_ and carried him for nine months. That is what those marks are. A show of your strength. Your body is amazing. You don't need a six-pack to be beautiful. I _am_ looking at you, Alec, and I love what I see. I love _you_. Every breathtaking inch."

Alec's eyes were shiny with tears. "I've been such an asshole," he mumbled brokenly.

"You have," Jace agreed. "A gorgeous asshole." He settled to sit cross-legged, placing Alec's legs over his and holding the Omega's outer thighs to support them as he became more serious. "I understand you've been scared and you've been hurting, Alec, but you've hurt me so much, too. You can't put me through that again. It's not fair to me. I've felt like I was failing, hell, I was genuinely sure you didn't want me as your Mate anymore. I was considering moving into the spare bedroom, or even out of the flat completely, because I was afraid that was what you wanted."

"I didn't," Alec said miserably. "I don't. Not ever."

"Tell me how I was supposed to know that based on how you've been treating me these last weeks," Jace requested, not angry, but needing Alec to understand.

"I'm sorry," Alec mumbled, looking down in shame.

"Don't be sorry, Alec," Jace murmured softly, stroking his Omega's thighs with his thumbs. "I know I was at fault, too, as I said. I should have tried harder to figure out what was wrong. Let's put this behind us, okay?"

"I love you so much, Jace," Alec answered, meeting his his gaze with honest eyes. "I love you, and what I've been doing has been beyond shitty, and I can't even explain why or how I could do something so rotten to my Mate. I hated myself for how I was behaving, and the more I hated myself, the more I didn't want to be around you because I was so ashamed of what I was doing. It's unforgivable. I can't believe I let it reach this point, where you genuinely questioned my devotion to you. You've been so patient and loving and understanding, and I've seen all your effort, and it made it worse because I felt more and more guilty, and I put that on you. I was angry because I was so scared. I should have had more faith in you, but I hate what I see in the mirror. I'm ugly. I don't feel good enough for you because of how I look now, and ended up acting in a way that made that true. I don't deserve you after what I've put you through. I know you say I don't need to be sorry, but I do, and I am, and I'll do better. I promise. I love you, my Alpha."

Jace pursed his lips, looking away. He met Alec's gaze. "Look at our son, Alec. Look at our perfect, healthy little boy. You gave us that gift, Alec. You can't believe any ugliness came out of his creation. You can't believe I would see anything other than beauty in the marks it created. You can't think I'd ever find you anything but perfect, no matter what. You're so fucking gorgeous. And not just because these," he cupped Alec's stomach, "were created by our baby. Not just because your beauty couldn't be diminished by supposed flaws, but because stretch marks are beautiful. Scars are beautiful. Fat is beautiful. Wrinkles are beautiful. They speak of love, and life, and strength. They are art. Your body is art. For the Angel's sake, Alec, you carried a _baby_ in here. A _human_. You created a _life_. Our precious boy. But no matter what changed your body, you are beautiful."

By now Alec was crying silently, and Jace carefully wiped the tears away with his thumbs. He leaned forward, pressing their lips together, and Alec met him, cupping Jace's cheeks as they kissed chastely.

"Let's face it," Alec murmured against Jace's lips with a grin when they pulled apart. "I pull off a post-pregnancy belly better than you would."

"Probably true," Jace smiled. "Though I think I'd look hot with a couple of stretch marks."

"Tiger stripes."

"Tiger stripes," Jace agreed. "My beautiful Omega."

"I'm sorry."

"I'm sorry, too."

"I love you, Alpha."

"Love you, my Omega."

 

TBC...


	2. Chapter 2

Jace woke up to find Max, but no Alec. There were delicious smells wafting from the kitchen, though, so he scooped up his gurgling baby and headed towards where he presumed his Omega was. He found him frying eggs, and Alec sent him a small, shy smile. Putting Max in the baby bouncer, Jace moved to stand behind Alec. He placed his hands lightly on Alec's hips, and Alec let him without flinching, even bowing his head forward in the way he did when he wanted Jace to kiss his neck. "Good morning."

"Good morning to you, too," Alec replied. "Slept well?"

"There's something about having a kicking baby waking up every two hours to feed that provides the best sleep," Jace joked.

"Personally, I slept really well," Alec said cheerfully. It was the first time he hadn't insisted on being the one to feed Max. Jace had gotten up with their baby all five times. He'd brought him into the kitchen so Alec would be disturbed as little as possible.

"I'm glad," Jace smiled against Alec's neck. He pressed a kiss to the top of Alec's spine. "I love you," he told Alec softly, then smiled against Alec's skin. "And now, our baby needs feeding."

"There's a bottle on the counter," Alec replied, turning his head and giving Jace an amused look. "Feeling affectionate today?"

"You know I can't keep my hands off you," Jace replied happily. Alec had encouraged him to feed Max. It felt amazing to have his Mate back. He stroked his hands up Alec's sides and back down to his hips, then carefully moved them to the front of Alec's stomach. Alec tensed, but when Jace nipped at the top of his spine, he melted against him.

"I've missed this," Alec admitted softly. "I've missed you."

"I'm right here," Jace promised. "Always."

They allowed themselves to enjoy their intimacy a little longer, until Max protested his lack of both attention and food. Giving a low chuckle, Jace stepped away from his Omega and picked up the bottle of milk. It was still pretty warm, so he only gave it a quick shake before putting it on the end of the island, by his stool. Picking up their baby, he settled in his seat and got the bottle for Max, smiling when he latched on happily and brought a pudgy hand up to press against the container.

"What's the measure?" Jace asked.

As a male Omega, Alec didn't produce milk as easily as a woman would, so he'd pump his milk and mix it with formula. They kept track of the percentage of both, since Alec's produced milk was much better for Max than formula. 

"Eighty and twenty, actually," Alec said with clear pride and happiness in his voice.

"Eighty yours?" Jace replied in pleasant surprise. Alec usually made about twenty to thirty percent of the mixture, and struggled managing anything above that.

"Mhm," Alec nodded as he scooped their food onto two plates. His contentedness was clear in his features as he placed their plates on the island.

"Come here," Jace said affectionately. He tilted his head up for a kiss, and Alec eagerly pressed their lips together for a few seconds before taking the seat diagonally to Jace, sitting so they were still facing each other, knees brushing. He looked serene, and Jace gave him a soft smile. "You did good."

"It was thicker, too," Alec informed him proudly. "More hindmilk."

"Look at you," Jace smiled. "You're glowing."

Alec looked away with a bashful smile. When he met Jace's gaze again, his eyes were sparkling. "And look at you. You look so handsome, daddy."

Delight burst in Jace's chest, and he stared down with a huge grin at Max, who was already falling asleep while still giving half-hearted sucks on the teat. He carefully eased it away, placing the bottle on the table. Max gave a small grumble, but was out like a light moments later. "What do you think the chances are that I can put him down without him waking up?" he asked Alec, looking up in time to catch Alec taking a picture of him with his phone.

"Perfect," Alec said, showing Jace the several pictures he'd sneakily taken while Jace had been caught up in their precious baby. "Yeah, you put him in the playpen, I'll bring the food."

Jace got up gingerly, doing his best not to jostle the little bundle in his arms. Alec had already walked past him, not needing to be so careful, and already had the plates on the table in front of the TV and his camera out, filming Jace's slow progress to the playpen and carefully putting Max down.

"Smile, daddy," Alec grinned, and Jace, in the middle of putting down the little bundle in his arms, lifted his head and met his gaze with a matching expression, full of joy. He straightened up, walking over to Alec and wrapping his arms around the Omega's waist and pulling him down for a kiss. Out of the corner of his eye he saw Alec flip the camera to forwards facing, filming them as their lips met. After that, all he paid attention to was his amazing Omega. The kiss was sweet and chaste. They broke it after a moment, and Alec gave a soft chuckle. "The food's going to be cold now."

"I don't care," Jace replied contentedly. "Everything's perfect."

"Sap."

"I love you."

"I love you."

"Let's eat."

Alec pecked him on the lips, and Jace reluctantly removed his arms from around the brunet, joining him on the couch.

"You know, if you want, I could ask Izzy if she could maybe take Max for an hour or two today," Alec offered nervously.

"You sure you'd be okay with that?" Jace asked softly. He'd love a little time alone with his Omega, but Alec could barely handle being in a different room to Max.

"I... Yeah, I wanna try," Alec said softly. "Maybe just an hour, though? And have Izzy be in the corner coffee place? Maybe Mags can be with her? And-"

"And I can see how stressed you're getting just talking about it," Jace cut him off gently. 

"I... I need to," Alec mumbled. "I need to try."

"Okay," Jace nodded. "Magnus and Izzy both, for thirty minutes. We'll work our way up to more."

"I was hoping maybe we could..." Alec mumbled.

"And what happens if you panic while we're tied?" Jace pointed out. "I'm not blaming you or trying to attack you," he added quickly, placing a hand on Alec's thigh. "I just don't want to push you too far too fast. I don't want your first time being away from Max to be a stressful experience where you end up trapped and can't just run three minutes down to the coffee shop if you find out that it's all too much."

"I just don't want to be stuck like I am now," Alec said in frustration. He sighed. "I'm afraid to leave him for even a few moments. I haven't even left this flat long enough to get the mail."

"That's what you're going to do today, then," Jace said. "We can ask Izzy and Magnus to babysit tomorrow. Today, you're going down to the coffee shop and get us both something to drink."

Alec pursed his lips for a moment, but then let out another sigh, giving in. "Yeah. You're right. That'd be a better first step."

********************

As Jace had predicted, small steps had been the right way to go. Despite Alec's wish for them to have alone time, his own anxiety had been more extreme than either had realised. Though Alec got antsy when away from Max, the severity became obvious when he couldn't make it out of the building before full-out panicking and running back. He'd plucked Max out of a befuddled Jace's arms, and holed up in the nursery for hours. Jace sat with him, holding his Omega close as Alec cried.

It had taken a full week before Alec made it to the door of the coffee shop, and another before he made it to the counter and got out his order. Twice that week he'd turned around because of the queue, once when he'd been asked what his order was, and the last time he'd left before the drinks were made. He'd been so upset about the last one that Jace had gone down and collected the cups that were still patiently standing there, having to explain to the barista that the Omega had had to go home because of the baby. Jace was surprised when Alec returned one day, drinks in shaky hand, and yet judging by the Omega's look, he was even more shocked that he'd actually managed it. He'd hurriedly placed down the cups and accepted Max, whom Jace had been holding out in offer, but he didn't instantly run to the nursery. Still quivering, he'd gone and settled on the couch in the living room, huddling up to Jace instantly and breathing his thanks when Jace wrapped his arms around them.

"I didn't know it would be this bad," Alec mumbled as he stared down at Max. "Being away from him is horrible."

"You did it, though," Jace pointed out with a smile. He'd brought the cups and placed them on the table, and now leaned over, picking up his and drinking from it. He didn't mention that Alec had forgotten sugar in his latte.

Alec watched him with a pleased expression. "I did," he agreed. "I knew he was safe with my Alpha. Not holding him, or at least seeing him, is really strange, though."

They'd been practicing at home, Jace taking Max more and more, and Alec taking over tasks like putting on and hanging up clothes washes, and cooking and cleaning and anything to keep his hands busy. Sometimes Jace had to stay in the same room as Alec, other times not even that was enough, and Alec would be unable to finish whatever he was doing before he'd demand to be given his baby. Jace could see the frustration on his Omega's face. He made sure to put emphasis on Alec's accomplishments, getting the brunet to focus on all the good things, no matter how small.

One time Alec had gotten good at parting with Max was whenever the baby let off a distinctive smell that had Alec's nose scrunching adorably. The brunet would sniff Max and check his nappie to be sure, then promptly pass him over to Jace, who'd accept Max with a chuckle. He didn't really mind. Max made some impressive smells and messes that Jace could have happily lived without having experienced, but he'd take anything that would make Alec not chomp at the bit to grab Max back. He'd stay in the bathroom with Max for a few minutes after he'd been changed, playing peek-a-boo and tickling him and generally having fun with the little boy, and seeing how long he could get away with it. Jace would marvel at his tiny feet and hands, and how strong his grip was when he grabbed Jace's finger, and how adorable his gummy smile was as he squealed happily. But Alec's dependency was two-sided, and eventually Max would start looking around, seeking out his second dad. It was difficult for Jace to see how his Mate and child were suffering, and he was grateful whenever Max held out a little longer. The baby's cries hindered Alec's own progress, so it was delicate work trying to keep Max and Alec separate for as long as possible, but making it back to the Omega before Max got upset. It made Jace feel terrible, too, because he didn't purposefully want to do anything that would hurt the man and child he loved. Their codependency was unhealthy, though, Jace knew that. As much as he could understand Alec wanting to be with Max all the time, he knew it wasn't possible, or good for any of them.

***********************************

Jace was pleasantly surprised one Saturday morning when he once again woke up to find only himself wrapped around Max. He picked up the gurgling baby, taking Max into the kitchen. There was no Alec, the only sign he'd been there a bottle, ready made and still warm. There was a note to let Jace know when it had been made, and it wasn't too long ago. Four minutes. So he'd just missed him. Jace heat-tested it, and, finding it fine, settled down and offered it to a now whinging Max. His son latched on happily, a pudgy hand pressing against the side. Jace couldn't help staring down at his little tiny miracle. He'd be forever grateful to his Omega for Max. He was completely in awe as he studied the little hands, with the small nails that, he noted, needed clipping. Those things were vicious. Max's squishy little face as the baby happily drank his milk, with the delicate lashes, adorable nose, and chubby cheeks, those huge eyes staring up at him, was one of the most amazing things Jace had ever seen.

The front door opened and closed, and the sound of a jacket and shoes being removed was just audible. Footsteps were heard, and Alec came into view a minute later. There was a grin on his face, and two paper cups in hand. "Good morning, daddy." he leaned down for a quick kiss.

"Good morning, daddy," Jace smiled in reply, tilting his head up to meet Alec. "You went down to the coffee shop," he noted, proud of his Mate.

"And your latte has sugar in this time," Alec winked as he joined Jace at the table.

Taking advantage of the lid, Jace allowed himself to carefully drink from the cup. He was always afraid of not having both hands on his baby, and also of spilling on him, so it was a quick taste. "It's perfect," he told his Omega. "You're perfect. I'm so proud of you."

Alec swallowed and looked away shyly, a pleased flush colouring his cheeks. He always did that when Jace complimented him, even after all these years. To avoid replying, he got up. "I'll make breakfast," he offered, taking his coffee with him and intermittently drinking it while he worked.

The Omega had never been good with compliments. Between his less than loving parents, and the way Omegas got treated in society, he'd received either disappointed, or derogatory remarks. The first year or so Jace had dated, and then courted him, Alec had struggled with how to deal with nice words. He was always suspicious, at best assuming Jace was trying to butter him up. At worst assuming Jace was playing him, and making fun of him. It had taken time, but eventually he'd started trusting Jace. Though he'd taken his compliments at face value, the Omega still had never figured out how to respond to them. Pleased blushes and soft smiles were the best Jace could hope for, even after all this time. He hadn't given up on getting Alec to smile happily while meeting his eyes, and maybe one day even responding with 'I know'. For now, though, he was content with Alec at least believing him.

Max was showing less enthusiasm for his drink as he slowly nodded off, and their son was so precious when he would try to continue eating even as he was falling asleep. The bottle was mostly empty, so Jace was satisfied with his efforts. He carefully placed Max in the baby bouncer, then took the opportunity to drink half his latte.

"Eighty mine, again," Alec informed him as he scrambled eggs, trying to pretend to be casual about it. Jace could tell he was proud by his glow and the small smile Jace could just see.

"You did so good," Jace complimented.

"Well," Alec corrected, sending Jace a teasing look. "And I did."

Jace laughed, pleasantly surprised by Alec's response He got up and wrapped his arms around his husband's waist. "You did so well," he murmured against Alec's shoulder, pressing a kiss there. Alec leaned back into the touch, tilting his head slightly forward, and Jace nuzzled the bared skin. He slipped his hands under Alec's shirt and placed them on his tummy, Alec as always tensing under the touch for a few seconds before relaxing again. "You are so beautiful."

"I'm stunning," Alec joked.

"You _are_ ," Jace said firmly. "Beautiful, and smart, and amazing. And mine."

"Yours," Alec agreed.

"My pretty Omega."

"My handsome Alpha."

Jace chuckled against Alec's neck. "Tell me you're smart."

"I'm smart."

"Tell me you're pretty."

Alec stayed silent, so Jace tickled his sides. Alec laughed and tried to squirm out of his grip. "Jace, the food!" he tried to complain. "Fine, fine! I'm pretty!"

"And amazing," Jace demanded playfully, not letting up.

"I'm amazing!" Alec choked out, desperately catching his breath when Jace let up. "You're cruel."

"I'm cruel," Jace agreed. "But right." He stole a kiss, before starting to get out plates and utensils. Alec dished up their scrambled eggs and bacon, along with toast.

"Bon appetite." Alec placed the plates on the table.

"This looks delicious," Jace commented, taking his seat.

"You look delicious," Alec replied, giving Jace a flirty look.

"Don't tease me, Omega," Jace mock-growled, licking his lips as he ran his eyes over what he could see of Alec.

"Eat," Alec replied, trying to hide his pleased look, and pointing at Jace's food with his fork.

Jace could see his smug smirk. "Oh, I'll eat," he said suggestively, enjoying Alec's shudder and momentary loss of composure, as well as the delightful blush that dusted his cheeks.

"I love you," Alec mumbled, smiling at his plate. He looked up when a small sniffle was heard, and glanced down at their son.

"I can take him," Jace offered, moving to pick Max up.

"I want to," Alec requested softly. "I haven't held him since I got up."

Jace nodded understandingly, handing Max over. He'd hoped his Omega would get to eat first, but he understood Alec's need to hold their son after so long. He watched his beautiful Mate and their beautiful son, and he felt so much love for them. As a young Alpha he'd never expected to find such an amazing Omega. He'd never had much interest in Omegas other than for a bit of fun. Then he'd seen Alec, and he knew he'd do anything to prove himself to the Omega. He knew Alec was it for him. But he hadn't expected Alec to consider him. While Jace was everything an Alpha should be, Alec wasn't a typical Omega, and for the first time ever Jace had felt insecure that he'd be enough. Alec was special. And he deserved someone special. Still, he'd chosen Jace. He'd honoured Jace by accepting his request to court, and request to Claim.

And now they had their perfect little baby. Alec had given him a family. 

"Thank you," Jace murmured, feeling overwhelmed.

Alec glanced up, one finger still gripped tightly in a tiny mitt. "Hm?"

"Thank you," Jace repeated. "For choosing me. For giving me this. A family and a loving home."

In reply, Alec smiled in that beautiful, breathtaking way that always made Jace's heart skip a beat. The way that lit up his entire face, making him look happy and carefree, that bared him in a way few got to witness. It was raw, and honest, and Jace realised how lucky he was all over again.

"I love you so much, Alec," Jace continued. "I'm grateful every day that I wake up next to the most amazing Omega I've ever met. The most amazing person. And I'm looking forward to spending the rest of my life with you."

"An amazing Omega needs an amazing Alpha," Alec smiled. He got up carefully, moving instead to straddle Jace, Max between them. "Never thought anybody would accept me the way I am. You've given me everything. Even put up with me when I was being an idiot."

"We've both been idiots at times," Jace answered, staring down at their son and lifting a hand to let Max grab onto it. "But we musta done something right, because look at what we made."

Alec giggled, which surprised Jace. At Jace's questioning look, Alec grinned shyly. "Just thinking of when we made him."

Jace laughed. He pressed a kiss to Max's hand, grasping Alec's hip lightly. "We do that right, too."

"Very right," Alec agreed as he played tug-a-war with Max.

Max gurgled happily, pulling his fathers's fingers and squealing when they gently pulled back. He held on tighter, making an adorable, concentrated look and a small grunting nose, and then Alec was passing him over to Jace.

"I'll heat up the food and make new toast," the Omega said, escaping the smell starting to emanate from their child.

"Great," Jace jokingly grumbled, not at all bothered. He checked their son, and accepted his fate, sighing as he got up. "Little poop machine," he told Max as he headed to the changing table in the bathroom.

Alec chuckled behind him.

TBC...


End file.
